Pastor Bob & The American Taliban is a musical project created by Brian Bartels, based in the depths of hell. Brian is a folk punk musician that brings a comical tone to some very real and serious subjects, such as political injustices, religious trauma, and mistreatment of minority groups, making jokes to cope and shine a spotlight on these issues, not making jokes to directly laugh at these problems we face in America.
The track we will be discussing today is titled "A Song for Bob", released on October 31st, 2024. The song starts off with muted strums on an acoustic guitar before jumping right into the main chords and vocals. Pastor Bob & The American Taliban hits all the checkpoints for creating classic folk-punk music (power chords on an acoustic guitar, banjo, the most insane vocals you'll ever hear in your life), but it is very clear how much time and energy was put into and spent on perfecting this track, it is well-produced, well-orchestrated, and has a bunch of memorable tidbits that may not be picked up on until a third, fourth, or fifth listen. Brian's vocal performance is so impressive because, even if it isn't your preferred sound or style, it is hilariously over-the-top, angsty, and full of iconic voice cracks, but also as someone who is an actual friend of this person, HE DOESN'T SOUND LIKE THIS WHEN HE TALKS! He has really mastered the craft of a crazy folk-punk voice and it's really fun to see him switch in and out of "character". It's almost like hearing a cartoon voice actor going back and forth from multiple different voices. And unlike a lot of folk-punk music (not an insult, just an observation from someone who also loves this genre) there are many songs that sound like they were written in five minutes on the back of a fast food wrapper, and then someone hit record on their phone and did one take, no post-production whatsoever. That is not the case with this new release from PB&TAT, the production is very clean and professional, but it doesn't take away from how quintessentially folk-punk this song is. The chorus kicks in with a layers of harmonizing vocals that sing in unison the lyrics "Bob hates minorities, thinks he has authority to tell people where to stick their penis." I hate to spoil such an unbelievable part of the song for anyone who hasn't heard it before, but after all, this is a review and I need to touch on every aspect that I'm able to. On the original demos by Pastor Bob & The American Taliban, this song was actually titled "Bob Hates Minorities" but Brian decided to change the name because it allowed for more shock value and comedic timing to hear the chorus on its own without any prior information, understanding, or warning. I'm sure he will discuss this decision further in our interview portion of this article. The first verse does the groundwork to explain who this "Pastor Bob" character is as a person, a transphobic, controversial hypocrite preacher. Verse 2 continues building this person with more specifics, and also including some very clever commentary about religion and war,
"The picture in your office
Of Jesus isn't intact
You know I hate to break it to you
But his skin was a little more black
You know not every single Muslim
Got a bomb strapped to their back
But if you're so afraid of terrorists
You should see what we did to Iraq"
This verse also includes some very well-choreographed placement of gang vocals that are effective in driving the point home with the lines "but his skin was a little more black" and "you should see what we did to Iraq" to really emphasize the point he is trying to make. The chorus repeats after this, identical to its first run, but is followed up by a bridge that includes some funny adlibs in the margins of the main vocals, such as,
"Bob I hope you know that I fucked my girlfriend on your desk (I really did!)
Then I came inside your Bible (bitch)
And took a shit right on your desk (ha ha ha) (wait...that's actually kinda gross)"
After the bridge concludes, we get a slowed down, quieter version of the chorus with some changes in the lyrics, ending on "where to stick their dicks!" and a moaning sound all screamed together by a group of people. Now the final choruses are in full throttle, all the instruments jump in along with a huge gang vocals section.
When I first heard this song, performed live in a basement full of people, I was immediately put off. This type of music is not for everyone, and specifically Pastor Bob & The American Taliban is definitely not for everyone! However, despite my original distaste, this song was an absolute earworm, and it is nearly impossible for me to get the lyrics from the chorus out of my head. Over the years, the more I listened to it, I was able to pick up on the humor and intricate silliness, perhaps the satire went a bit over my head the first time (somehow, I don't know how, because it's VERY blatant satire). I really think it's thoroughly impressive how catchy this song is, how easily it can be sung along to, especially for a song about some asshole pastor preaching problematic and damaging rhetoric that includes hate speech. It's really fun to collectively hate this person, and Brian does a fantastic job capitalizing on that while also flipping the script and pointing out all the flaws in Bob's logic. I think it is a very slippery slope that Brian has gone down, making a musical project named after a terrible person, singing very edgy songs about said person, that at first glance might rub people the wrong way, but in recent years, Brian has put an effort into recreating these songs and slightly rebranding so the audience can be a bit more in on the joke and not feel weird or uncomfortable when they first hear this music. At the end of the day, this type of music IS supposed to evoke emotion, it IS supposed to prompt discussion, and I think it manages to do that in a very fun way. I was also fortunate enough to play a part in this song; there is a music video for "A Song for Bob" coming out in the near future on YouTube and Patreon that was edited by yours truly. I worked very closely with Brian to utilize his footage to craft the visuals that he had very well mapped out in his head, and I'm no professional video editor, but I think it turned out absolutely hysterical and I can't wait for you to see it!
It was a privilege to get to shine a spotlight on my friend's music and I hope you all take the time to give it a chance! Thank you for reading, and make sure to continue down below to get more insight on this song and project via my interview with Brian Bartels of Pastor Bob & The American Taliban.
Interview:
Today I am joined by an old friend of mine, Brian Bartels. Brian and I met while playing a show together in Pittsburgh, late February of 2020, only a few weeks before the world ended. I don't know how or why we managed to stay in contact all these years, but we have, and within the last year I have finally changed his contact card in my phone from "Pastor Bob" to "Brian Bartels (Pastor Bob)". I am happy that our bond is growing thicker every day.
Thank you, Brian, for allowing me to discuss your music and ask you some questions!
Brian: Thank you for having me! You're genuinely one of my favorite people, and possibly Philadelphia’s only redeeming quality. It’s an honor to be included in this cool new project of yours!
Let's start off simple, where does the name "Pastor Bob & The American Taliban" come from?
Brian: Pastor Bob is an alias for a real pastor at the church I attended in grade school as part of an extra-curricular program for homeschooled children and teens. Pastor Bob’s first interaction with me was chasing me down in the hallway in 2014 to ask if I would sign an anti-trans petition so I “wouldn’t get r*ped in the bathroom” or whatever. Personally, I think that’s a rather unhinged way to introduce yourself to a middle-schooler, but I digress.
Anyways, Pastor Bob had a “good news board” posted outside of his office, which was mostly used to post print-outs of the most racist articles you could reasonably find on the internet without opening 4chan. The first one I noticed was an essay on why Muslims should not be allowed in the country and how they're literally incapable of being good citizens. The article fear mongered about Sharia Law and I thought it was ironic because Pastor Bob was advocating for the same thing—just replace “Allah” with “Yahweh.”
I started referring to the church as “Pastor Bob & The American Taliban” and as a gag, I started writing diss tracks about the guy to share with my friend group. Once I had enough of these songs to fill half an LP, it only seemed fitting to name the project after him. I never intended for the project to become anything more than an outlet for me to trash on this dirtbag priest, but eventually, “Pastor Bob & The American Taliban” became the name I’d put on flyers when playing solo sets, performing all of the music that no one else in my other bands wanted to play. “The reject songs,” as I called them, ended up resonating with audiences far beyond anything else I had written. I never anticipated that kind of broader appeal and it's a real privilege to play shows all these years later centered around an inside joke I never thought would leave my small circle.
How long have you been making music, whether it be under Pastor Bob or any other previous projects? What instruments do you play, and what made you want to start picking them up?
Brian: I started learning how to play guitar when I was 5 or 6 years old, having idolized Drake Bell and Relient K. I started picking up piano not long after and drums around the time I was 10. I really liked getting my hands on new instruments and trying to learn what I could. I started writing my own music when I was 14, which was largely influenced by Three Days Grace with a focus on religious doubt and feelings of abandonment. Some of those lyrics were repurposed for my first serious project, Makeshift Closure, in 2015—which was heavily influenced by Baggage from Flint (MI), as well as bands like Basement, Mayday Parade, Box Car Racer, and Bring Me the Horizon.
It was always really important to me to write all the parts myself, so I eventually caught on to everything you'd hear in a standard rock band, including vocals—which did not come easy and are still not my strongest suit. That's why we play folk punk, yeah? My childhood music instructor, Joe, encouraged versatility and I have him to thank for my background in jazz guitar, classical guitar, and other genres in a modern context. This taught me early on that music is best when you refuse to limit yourself.
Circa 2017, I fell in love with folk punk, as I started to relate to the lyrical themes focused heavily on struggles with addiction and a general sense of nihilism. Around that time, I started learning how to play the new variety of instruments I'd hear on those records like the banjo, mandolin, and washboards. This was my grandpa’s bread and butter, so he happily gifted me my first mandolin which was once his.
Soon after, a pop punk-style folk band from Ohio called Down They Fall turned me onto the Melodica—which in no uncertain terms, changed the course of my life. Finally, I could own an instrument as strange and as goofy as I am. I started incorporating these new instruments into the songs I had piled up over the years about Pastor Bob. This is largely what turned Pastor Bob & The American Taliban from a loose catalog of gag music about a priest I hated into a full-on folk punk project—one that held room for a variety of topics, but still incorporated the same kind of humor when I touched on more serious matters.
"A Song for Bob" is a brand new single, however, it was previously released in 2019 with an alternate title, what made you decide to start re-recording and re-releasing your older music? What can we expect next?
Brian: A few factors went into my decision to re-release the OG Pastor Bob album. Firstly, I started my own label in 2023, Macbeth Theater, and I wanted to give the album a proper release now having the background I need to do it. I didn't fully know what I was doing when I audio-engineered that first album, and given the positive response these songs still get at shows, I felt like the LP deserved a touch-up with a fresh mix and master. I teamed up with Dead String Audio, who I fully credit as the reason why this album is now sounding better than ever.
However, the biggest reason I wanted to re-release the album is to flesh out a concept I felt was often missed entirely by newer audiences who weren't in on the inside joke. Remember, this project was initially intended for my friends and I to make fun of some asshole we all knew in real life. Once things started to pick up, I'd pull up to shows and people I hadn’t met would say, “Yo, it's Pastor Bob!” right before hearing me scream lines like “Bob hates minorities!” to an audience who apparently thinks I'm Bob. Yikes.
No one questioned my intent, as I don't think I could pass for a Republican even if I tried. That said, I wanted to re-release a version of the album that was friendlier to new audiences, something with more exposition to make listeners feel in on the joke. After all, I think we've all met someone like Pastor Bob. The album’s new opening track sets the stage perfectly with the help of some especially talented voice actors and good friends of mine, Braden and Quincy. I'm excited for you to hear it!
As far as what's next, you’ll be hearing a few more singles while I save up the money I need to unleash this remaster in its entirety—along with a full merch drop and tour. My goal with this release cycle is to really establish Pastor Bob & The American Taliban as the Frankenstein of music, theatre, satire, and comedy with a D.I.Y. punk rock twist. This new effort of mine is imprinted in everything from the live show, which has progressively incorporated more and more elements of stand-up comedy and theatre, to the stylistic choice to feature new collage art on the cover of my future releases courtesy of the masterful Casey Babb. This re-release is merely the first step in creating the environment in which I want to release my new material.
How many of the lyrics in "A Song for Bob" are based in reality and true events?
Brian: All of them, except the part about having fucked my girlfriend on his desk and then taking a dump in his office. I did not actually do that. Sorry to disappoint, but that was a petty exaggeration after someone at the church complained about me “groping my girlfriend” or something because we were holding hands. PDA was not acceptable at the church, which ultimately led from that short line to an entire song called “Public Display of Affection,” which is also featured on the LP. Eat shit, Bob.
"A Song for Bob" came out on Halloween, was there any significance to that being it's release day? What did you do for Halloween this year? And what was your favorite Halloween costume you've ever had?
Brian: Really, the significance was more about wanting to drop the single before the election results. Not to sound like a liberal soyboy bitch-baby, but elections have a very serious impact on me and my friends and it can be scary to feel unsafe in a hostile political climate. When we filmed the music video for “A Song for Bob,” there was a strong sense of acceptance, understanding, and community. Many of us come from backgrounds in which we felt alienated for not having fit into a box. There are people who hate us simply for who we are and put serious effort into making our lives harder. Releasing the single before political tensions spiral further felt like an opportunity to remind my supporters that no matter what happens, we've got each other's backs.
Regarding Halloween costumes, I've done Donnie Darko at least 5 times. You can add my Halloween show last night to the tally. Nothing beats throwing a gray jacket over a skeleton tee and writing 28:06:42:12 on my arm. Maybe I'm just autistic. I don't know because cognitive testing is expensive and I haven't done it since my brain was fried from narcotics. I'll be Donnie Darko next year too and it's going to be fucking awesome.
Do you have any fun behind-the-scenes stories about the production of this track? How was it to re-record your old songs from, at this point, five years ago?
Brian: Oh, god. It was kind of a mess. I wanted to re-record some lyrical adjustments on “A Song for Bob” but largely had to scratch that idea because my voice is a lot different now than it was when I was a 19-year-old druggie with a complete lack of concern for my health. I take care of myself now, or at least I try to, and you can hear it in my voice.
Ultimately, I had to work solely with adlibs and backing vocals to complement the audio that already existed. Call me a poser, but I relied heavily on pitch correction for reworked melodies given that I just couldn't make some of those sounds anymore. A few times, the program would glitch out and I would sound like T-Pain or Ke$ha on the playback. I thought that was pretty funny, and honestly, it makes me want to release a 3OH!3-style album one day.
A good friend of mine, Leonidus, tracked some harmonies to bring out the melodies in the chorus and bridge. I was holding back laughter during each take because they're classically trained and I had them singing these beautiful harmonies over just a few lyrics at a time on lines like “I came inside your Bible,” delivered as if their admission into Juilliard depended on it.
Your music is a very specific, somewhat satirical, type of political folk-punk, what kind of musical influences do you have that lead someone to make the type of music that you do?
Brian: As someone who has had a passion for music for as long as I could comprehend it, it’s hard to pinpoint a concise list of what's shaped my approach to writing. I think what people hear the most in my music is a bit of Bo Burnham mixed with folk punk classics like Pat the Bunny, Andrew Jackson Jihad, Apes of the State, and Days N Daze. My childhood obsession with Marilyn Manson largely influenced how I'd incorporate shock value and religious imagery into my music, and bands like Green Day and My Chemical Romance showed me how much presentation and theming matter. Because of the types of music I gravitated towards, politics overlapped heavily regardless of genre—especially when it came to bands like Rage Against the Machine, System of a Down, and Anti-Flag. I learned early on that music can be used as a tool to shape a future we can feel proud of.
You have also recently launched your own D.I.Y label, which you previously mentioned, called "Macbeth Theater", what went into that decision and what are your goals for this project? What can you tell us about the process of creating this label and what do you hope to have come from it?
Brian: Macbeth Theater started as a name I could slap on flyers when throwing shows at my parents’ house without their consent while I was in high school. (Sorry Mom, Sorry Dad.) There’s an old myth that saying the word “Macbeth” inside of a theater brings bad luck, at least if you ask superstitious theatre kids. The name was a gag, implying the show itself was always bad luck. I mean, what is pursuing a career in punk rock if not intentionally risking everything? My mindset was “Bring it on. I don't care, because I want this.”
My career as the not-owner of my parents’ house did not last very long, believe it or not. I only hosted maybe two or three shows total, but those memories left me with a lasting vision of one day opening up my own venue. In the meantime, I started teaching lessons, recording music for friends, booking shows, planning tours, setting up a label, and whatever else I could think of to help build an accessible scene. To me, it was all Macbeth, so that's what I call it. “Macbeth Theater” is when you do something you love even though the odds are clearly stacked against you. My whole life is saying “Macbeth” inside the theater and hoping for the best.
Your music is very political in nature. Is there anything you'd like to say to people who may be less knowledgeable about the United States government?
Brian: Stay uninformed and write in the name of your favorite pet when voting in this election.
(Please do not actually do that.)
I've actually got a lot of homies overseas. It's interesting hearing about their impressions of the United States having never lived here. For someone who doesn't know much about our government, I'd say it's simultaneously better and worse than you'd expect. If you come in with the mindset that the United States is good or it's bad, you'll be in for a surprise either way.
The wrongdoings of our government are no secret. I think most of the people who live here lack trust in our systems and institutions, regardless of how politically engaged they are. Really, what I wish people focused more on is local politics because it's something we actually have reasonable control over. You aren't going to stop the CIA from interfering with elections in foreign countries, but you can make a genuine impact locally—and with surprisingly minimal effort. Start by joining your local tenant union. You'll meet the right people.
Who do you think would be an ideal demographic for your music? Give us a quick sales pitch for who should listen!
Brian: I can't fully explain this correlation, but if you frequently think about the scene from Scooby Doo 2 (2004) where Shaggy grows tits, you are absolutely going to enjoy my music.
Are there any other artists/friends/family/etc. that you'd like to use this time to shoutout?
Brian: Pastor Bob & The American Taliban is a community-oriented project with an emphasis on collaboration. Shoutout to every single person who has ever brought something unique to the table. You're what makes this project so special.
Additional shoutout to my extra supportive family and friends who have gotten me through some very dark times, to Manny for her faith in Macbeth and willingness to take these new steps with me, and to Strangeness In Proportion for releasing some heat last month and inviting me on for this badass inter-review!
Thank you again for answering some questions. I hope the release of your new single "A Song for Bob" has a great reception!
Brian: Thanks! I hope Bob likes it.
It was great to talk to a good friend about his creative endeavors, and once again, I hope you all take a chance and give his new song a listen!
You can find all of his links HERE!
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