*Note: Some interviews are currently blank because, due to various unforeseen circumstances, people were unable to get me their answers in time. I apologize for the inconvenience. I will be updating this post with the interviews as soon as I receive them.
Hey, everyone. Thank you all for being so supportive and understanding while I took my brief break from posting. I hope this long inter-review will make up for the time I was gone. I don't normally like to promote my own music on CD-ROM Rabbit Hole; In some weird way, I feel that doing so would take away from the other artists I am trying to shine a spotlight on, and it feels a little cheap for me to constantly repost my music on this page. I can't really explain myself but it's just how I feel; I have wanted to keep these two entities separate for as long as possible. However, my music will come up on rare occasions, and I felt as though now was a good time.
On March 13th, 2020, I released an album titled "Secondhand Heartbeat" under the pseudonym of Strangeness In Proportion. This release only had six tracks and was my fourth album (if you can even call it an album, having only six songs). But we'll come back to that. Like every drawn-out, unnecessarily long story, we must start at the beginning.
I started playing guitar when I was 12 years old and ever since my first lesson, I was trying to start a band. Yeah, all I could play was "Smoke on The Water" and "Iron Man" but in my 12-year-old mind that was enough. Throughout the following years, puberty was hitting me like a ton of bricks and I experienced the collapse of many friends groups and "bands". When I was about 15 years old, everything in my life felt like it was falling apart; I decided to pick up my acoustic guitar and start writing songs all on my own. My first album was called "Dinosaurs In Dollar Stores" released on May 15th, 2015. I always hated listening to myself sing; I think there was a point in every kid's life where they try to record themselves singing and then when they listen to the audio, they cringe and delete it as fast as possible. I knew this would be the case, so I actually recorded all of these songs in one take on my phone and refused to listen to them. I was so determined to release my songs that I didn't care how terrible they sounded, and I knew that if I listened to them I would decide to give up and throw everything away. A few months after that album released, I started my sophomore year of high school, and I met someone who suggested I try re-recording these songs "professionally" (what "professionally" meant at the time was going into his basement and recording music using Garageband on his iPad and giving him too much money for it). This re-recorded version of "Dinosaurs In Dollar Stores" came out on January 15th, 2016.
Something about me is, once I got the music bug, I couldn't stop no matter what. I was always, ALWAYS writing new songs. I would finish one album, and immediately start writing my next one; sometimes I would even be writing two albums simultaneously. By this point, I was 16 years old and had already started writing songs for a concept album. Pretty ballsy of a 16-year-old to think he could write a compelling concept album, but I can't think of anything that describes teenage ego better than that. This concept album was attempting to use winter and spring as a metaphor for depression and recovery. At this point in my life, I had quite a few years of experiencing seasonal depression (I was always depressed, but it started getting really, really bad in the winter), but this year was the first time in a long time where I actually felt legitimate, consistent happiness, and it started right around when spring had begun. The idea was, the first half of the album would be "winter" songs that are dark, depressing, and ominous, then there would be an instrumental interlude, which would lead us into the "spring" songs, which were upbeat, happy, and sounded pretty. For a 16-year-old, the idea was definitely there, however the execution was fumbled incredibly. I definitely was trying to take on something that was way beyond my musical skill set, and at the time I did not understand the importance of mixing and mastering. Long story short, this was my second album, "Thaw The Earth".
Once again, I IMMEDIATELY started working on my next album. This one would be BIG! It was about time I release a self-titled album that really explains who I am and what Strangeness In Proportion is all about. The big, grand idea was to release an album with AT LEAST twenty tracks (bad idea). I took this idea to a professional recording studio in my area, and I started recording while simultaneously writing new songs that would eventually end up on this album. Around this time, I was going through a nasty breakup, started taking meds, got admitted into a psychiatric facility (which I crudely referred to as "the loony bin"), and dropped out of school (I was about halfway through my Junior year of high school). Needless to say, I had a lot of free time to write these "AT LEAST twenty songs!" A few things happen when a 17-year-old walks into a professional studio saying they want to record a twenty-song album. The first thing is, they look at you like you're crazy. The second thing is, they look at you with big dollar signs popping out of their eyes. The third thing is, it immediately becomes quantity over quality. Most of the songs did not have the time to be fleshed out, for multiple reasons. The biggest two issues were:
1. I would finish writing the lyrics and guitar chords for a song, throw it in a pile, and move onto the next one.
2. I was paying this studio $50 dollars an hour and did not have the money or time to do a bunch of takes and hire musicians that would have allowed for all these songs to have more substance and sound more interesting and dynamic.
From writing, to recording, to releasing this album, the whole process took a good chunk of time (not nearly ENOUGH time considering what I was trying to do) and it came out on November 22nd, 2017. Up until this point, I had been releasing my music on Bandcamp and SoundCloud only; but around this time, I found myself deeply involved in a bunch of Facebook musician groups and was constantly trying to network and make connections. Somewhere along the way, I had come in contact with a man named Colin Marit, a Canadian dude that loved punk music and smoking weed. He reached out to me about joining his independent record label, "Fixed Frequency", and releasing my new album on all major streaming platforms (more on Colin later). Obviously, I took this opportunity and genuinely thought this was my "big break!" After this album, I took a little bit of time to promote, play shows, network, make music videos, and try to get my life back on track, but of course I was still writing new songs.
In my brief hiatus (if you can call it that) from actively recording new music, I had grown a little bit and my brain had developed ever so slightly. I had three albums under my belt and had learned a lot in those few years. I was discovering that by the time I was ready to release a new album, I didn't really enjoy my previous one as much, and I found myself becoming less and less proud of my past works. Something huge that I learned was how to cut songs. By that point, I recorded and released almost every single song I ever wrote, and to say that many of them should have been cut or, at least, reworked, would be an understatement. That finally brings us up to speed, now we can talk about the main purpose of this article. "Secondhand Heartbeat" was my fourth album and released on March 13th, 2020 (Friday The 13th). Something interesting happened in the months leading up to this release, and I took full advantage of it. There was a Friday the 13th in September of 2019, a Friday the 13th in December of 2019, and another one in March of 2020. Frankly, we should have taken that as a forewarning that the world would end in 2020. For the first time ever, I had booked a tour that would coincide with the release of this album and help promote it, but obviously, Covid had other plans for me. I was so incredibly proud of these songs and had a wonderful experience writing and recording them, and I genuinely believed these were the best songs I had ever written and WOULD EVER write. I took my time with them, really perfected them, I experimented with different instruments, and worked with new musicians, as well as a new producer. A producer that I was actually happy with, someone who was well-known in the Philly DIY scene, and someone that really understood my vision and worked closely with me to help it come to fruition, Dylan Tasch. We recorded this album entirely in their house, but this time it was a house that actually had proper recording equipment and someone who knew what they were doing. This house was Midley Grange Recording Studio. And don't worry, we'll talk to Dylan later. I think the best thing to do now, to avoid revealing too much more information too early on (and to avoid any further unnecessary rambling), we should probably jump into this "review" and discuss each track one-by-one. Quickly before we get into it, I will say that this is not going to be like my typical reviews. I am not writing this to be all "look at me, look at how awesome and great my music is!" My goal in doing this is to reflect on my experience as well as put a critical eye and ear on my music to figure out my thoughts on it after five years.
I'm Trying To Smoke These Hornets:
The first track starts off with a simple acoustic lick for the intro and is quickly followed up with the inclusion of a melodica that mimics the same notes of the opening guitar as the acoustic breaks into full strumming. After the intro, the melodica cuts out, the guitar continues, and we add vocals, cajon (played by Greg Rodriguez), and tambourine. I will admit, the vocals are a little rough; by this point I still wasn't fully comfortable with my voice and didn't exactly know how to operate it. I had gotten WAY better in my years of practice leading up to this album, but it was still a little bit chaotic and all over the place. The pre-chorus slows the song down with softer vocals and some dreamy accentuation from an electric guitar as the base acoustic guitar is playing palm-muted chords. As the pre-chorus continues, it starts to get louder with the inclusion of droning melodica, more discernable cajon, projected vocals, and harder-strummed guitar. I'll be honest, there aren't a lot of changes in this song, for the most part the verses are the verses, the chorus is the chorus, so on and so forth, there's not a ton of switch up or anything, I guess this song serves it's purpose regardless, but it's definitely not trying to do anything groundbreaking. The second chorus comes at us hard with much more raspy, aggressive vocals from myself as well as Raul Casas. Raul was a friend of mine from high school who came into the studio to meet Dylan about possibly working with them to record his band's EP, and if I remember correctly, I brought him in solely to sit in on a studio session and see how Dylan works, and while recording this song I asked him to hop on vocals really quick. Musically, there isn't a ton to latch onto for me personally, it definitely resembles the type of folk-punk music I was listening to at the time, but I don't often choose to listen to this song on my own volition. Funny enough, while we were recording, this was actually my least favorite song on the album, and I couldn't quite pinpoint what was wrong with it, why I felt it wasn't working, or what could be added or changed to make it better. Until one day I discovered the melodica and I pretty much said "THAT'S WHAT THIS SONG NEEDS!" and solely because of the melodica, this song went from being my least favorite all the way up to having the honor of being the opening track to the album. The melodica definitely did all the heavy lifting for this one, and it is still my favorite part of the song. The title is a quote from "It's Always Sunny In Philadelphia" when Charlie has a box of hornets and is trying to smoke them out to get their honey. I'll be honest, this is a crazy thing to confess, I've never really watched a ton of Always Sunny. I don't dislike the show at all, I just never bothered to take the time and binge it or anything. The reason behind the title is a very silly one; there were a lot of pop-punk/midwest emo bands that would reference the show, and in my head I thought "well clearly this show is a staple of modern emo music, I guess I HAVE to have a song about "It's Always Sunny." Regardless of my poser-esque reasoning for the song title, I still think it's a lot of fun. The title was actually going to be "I Eat Stickers All The Time, Dude" originally, until I typed that title into Spotify and found out there was already a song called that (shoutout the band Basement Beers) so I opted for a different quote as my title. I don't remember a ton about actually writing or recording this song besides little tidbits. Actually most of my memories of this song revolve around shooting the music video sometime in October of 2020. I was taking courses at community college and started a video editing class; we were still doing zoom classes and I had not left my house or really seen anyone in person for about six or seven months, so majority of the class started bonding very quickly. A couple months into this class, we had mostly become very good friends and eventually we decided to start seeing each other in person (slowly and safely because we were all still very uncomfortable with the risk of catching Covid, but also very much starved for human interaction). Our professor was very lax and pretty much let us do whatever we wanted for assignments, so at some point I suggested that we film a music video and the class could edit it for one of our projects. A small group of us got together and we only shot for two days, one day was in the library parking lot, and the other day was in my house. We didn't have much of a storyboard (or really any idea whatsoever), all we knew was that the video would involve a sheet ghost following me around and doing funny stuff. We all got together and had an absolute blast running around as ghosts, riding skateboards, spilling hot chocolate (if you know, you know), and whatever other nonsense we could think of. I actually decided to make a bit of a "cinematic universe" with my music videos, and decided to recreate some shots from "Slightly Burnt Coil", using different angles as to reveal that The Ghost character was there the whole time, just out of frame (see the "Slightly Burnt Coil" section to read more about that). We had about three different bed sheets and switched around who would be dressed as a ghost. Myself, as well as my good friends, Jack Kyle and Sean Walsh also had their fair share of screen time as ghosts; Sean being mostly behind the camera shooting and directing with a few opportunities as a ghost, and Jack primarily being a ghost for the interior shots of my house while I was out of costume, and he also had a good amount of time on screen as himself. Down below, I have attached interviews with both of them to discuss their time on set and what they remember from filming!
Interview with Sean Walsh and Jack Kyle:
Hey! Thanks for sharing some of your time to talk with me about the music video for "I'm Trying To Smoke These Hornets".
First and foremost, reminisce with me and share everything you remember about that time. What do you remember leading up to it, how we planned the video, any fun behind-the-scenes moments, etc.?
Jack: Unfortunately I don’t remember much, the thing that sticks out the most to me is you mentioning small details about a sheet ghost. Like how I’d kinda just be standing still and leering. A lot of it was very flying by and I think I got brought in after a lot of the discussion took place. It was fun getting the sheets together though as I think that’s when you asked me if I would do a “Jason Derulo” bit for one of your songs. We never got around to it but it’s good to have in the back pocket.
Sean: As your classmate in that video editing class, I recall the assignment our professor gave us was to edit together a music video using footage he supplied us. However, the song used in the provided footage was like nails on a chalkboard, so when you brought up the idea of shooting our own footage for the assignment, I was thrilled.
There was a trend around that time involving “ghost photoshoots” which we had discussed leading up to this production, and I believe you were the one who came up with the idea to incorporate that into the music video. So we packed a car with some bedsheets, a few cameras, and a dream.
Day one of shooting was a lot of fun (at least for me, because that was when I got to be in the ghost costume)! I remember having to work on keeping my balance as I was standing up and dancing through the sunroof of the car as you were driving it around the library parking lot. It was totally worth it though! Those shots came out great and are a fun addition to the video. The sequence where we had to run down a hill was a little bit tougher (there were some takes where we all completely wiped out), but it came out great!
Day two I got to spend more time behind the camera as Jack took over the role of ghost. For some reason, the “behind the scenes setup” for that day that really sticks in my head is the scene where you descend into the basement to grab your guitar. We were all basically crouched in separate areas of your basement shooting different angles behind piles of stuff so we wouldn’t be in anyone else’s coverage. I’m glad we went through the effort, that whole sequence looks amazing in the final edit!
I also remember thinking there was a good chance you were going to fall off your roof when we filmed those shots, but you kept your balance relatively well.
If you could change anything about the final video, what would it be? Would you have done anything different while shooting/acting/editing?
Sean: As I mentioned before, we both used this footage for our own separate video editing class projects. So I do have a full edit of this music video sitting on my hard drive. While I do love the final edit that you published, there was one shot I remember really being proud of on my version. In my edit of the footage, when the camera moves from the flowers in the garden to you playing guitar in the background, I messed with the saturation and exposure of the flowers to seem almost ethereal, with the effect fading as the camera moved to focus on you. I just remember thinking that it looked amazing!
Jack: I certainly would’ve changed my wardrobe. While I admire my previous self’s confidence in trying to pull off a Freddy Krueger sweater and cargo shorts with blue socks, I think I could’ve worn something better to eternalize myself with. Also taking off my glasses while under the sheet would’ve made the ghost look better. I’m sure I couldn’t see anything without them but I’m also sure I couldn’t even see anything with them under the sheet.
After watching the video again, how do you feel we did at making a successful visual representation of the song?
Sean: We knocked it out of the park. It’s a fun and engaging watch that wears its themes on its sleeve, but that’s not a bad thing! The shots of you and Jack having fun and spending time together really help to build up this notion of an “idealized” version of your friendship that is now haunting you since your friend is no longer with you. The concept of representing a missing relationship that weighs on you as a ghost is an interesting idea, and I think it plays very well in the execution.
Jack: I’ll say yes, perhaps partially unintentionally. The song is imperfect with a number of areas to improve on. The video shares that. My spillage makes it into the final cut, there’s room for improvement in the vocals, the planning could’ve been done better to make a more coherent story out of the middle section, there’s a general feel of juvenile/amateur-ness all with a dark part as well. But those are reflections of the song and they evoke the tone of the song in a separate but genuine way.
Finally, I know neither of you were involved in the production of the song itself, but give me your honest thoughts and opinions: do you like this song? What do you like/dislike about it, and why?
Jack: I like the melodica the most. The catchy tune has stuck with me for a while now. Granted I remembered it wrong, and I didn’t realize until I relistened to the song for this. The main subject matter of the song is also something I can relate to. Perhaps not the specifics like in regards to memories of smoking, so I would have to say that’s the part I “dislike” the most. But that’s part of the song’s character and makes it its own. You can tell that a lot of yourself was put into it.
Sean: I love this song! I go back and forth between this song and “Blackout On Your Block” as my favorite one of your songs. “I'm Trying To Smoke These Hornets” has such a strong opening (that melodica really does catch your attention)! The lyrics help to tell an interesting narrative, and as the song builds and the second chorus comes in with the backing vocals and intensified sound, I can’t help rocking out alongside it.
"I'm Trying To Smoke These Hornets" Music Video
Puzzles:
Track two is easily one of the prettiest songs I've ever written. Ever since this song, I have not picked up a ukulele, and I most likely won't opt to make another sappy love song based around the instrument again. The song starts with soft and slow ukulele strumming, quickly followed by the high-pitched strings of my acoustic guitar plucking the same two notes leaning on the right side of the speakers. When I was recording this song, I was very concerned about the redundancy of playing the same notes over and over again, but I was convinced by everyone else that the notes would eventually be tuned out by listeners and it would just be added noise to fill out the mix. I sure hope that's the case, I THINK it is, and I am hoping the reason it sticks out to me so much is because I recorded it and had to be extra critical and observant of every aspect of the track. There is a lot going on while simultaneously not much going on; there is a good amount of sound all collaborating together, but not a whole lot of diversity or changes happening. However, having said that, what carries the song are the incredible vocals by Gabriella. Unfortunately, Gabi opted not to speak with me about her time in the studio recording this song. I completely, wholeheartedly respect her decision and right to privacy, and we will leave it at that. Gabi and I met sometime in late middle school and kept in touch throughout the years. At the time, Gabi had started dipping her toes into making music and was posting some quick original songs on Soundcloud that I absolutely adored. It was the perfect mix of lo-fi, bedroom pop, indie girl sound that I thought would be exactly what I needed for this duet I was writing. My vocals are still a bit shaky and I'll be honest, I was directly trying to mimic Gabi's vocals as much as possible because of how beautifully they fit the song; I really had to tone down my usual obnoxious vocal performance. If I remember correctly, I actually went back a few times to re-record my own vocals because I was not loving how they were turning out, and there's a quick story behind the take that we ended up using. The final time I returned to track my vocals for this song, I was smoking weed (not a great idea when you're about to record vocals, but in this case, I think it worked out) and when I got up to the microphone, I was so high that I started channeling my inner Frank Sinatra. I really stood up there with my eyes closed, imagining myself in a nice suit on the stage of a fancy venue, swaying back and forth and making my voice as floaty and posh as I could. Such an embarrassing story to reveal, but that's how I got the take. I'm not going to lie and say I nailed my vocal performance, honestly I don't think I've EVER nailed a performance, but I do the best I can do and then call it a day. Don't get me wrong, there's a lot of problems with my vocals, but it also isn't ear-bleeding levels of terrible either, so I'll call that a win. Like I said earlier, there aren't many changes in this song, but I do appreciate the attempts at throwing some variety in there, specifically the strums and twinkly guitar that end in a pause before the chorus. I loved how our vocals worked together for the chorus (entirely to Gabi's credit); the one thing I will say about the chorus is I don't understand my decision to write the lyrics as "the puzzles not completed" instead of "the puzzles uncompleted". Maybe I forgot that "uncompleted" was a word; the world will never know, and I can't even begin to tell you what I was thinking. This was the second and final single I released from the album, it came out December 13th, 2019 (Friday The 13th) with an accompanying music video. The music video is pretty bare bones and clearly homemade. For the video, I bought a custom puzzle online with the album artwork and the entire video is just different angles of me struggling to build the puzzle. Honestly, looking back, I have no idea how I finished the puzzle as fast as I did. I am very much NOT a person that does puzzles, so frankly I admire my commitment to the bit and am impressed with my ability to do it all in one sitting for the video.
"Puzzles" Music Video
Vivian:
Something I liked to do on my earlier albums was have Easter eggs or references to my previous releases, or in some cases I would even rework old songs and put them on a new album or hide them as bonus tracks. That is the case for track three. "Vivian" was originally released on January 9th, 2016 from an EP titled "The Boy With The Irreparable Heart" (wow, so edgy, so emo). This song definitely sounds like it was originally written by a sixteen-year-old who was heavily leaning into the melodrama of high school relationships. The song starts with individually-picked guitar notes and overlaying single strums that ring out until the next strum arrives. Along with the vocals, there is a subtle synth playing the root notes to give more atmosphere and subliminal emotion to the song. The synth was utilized by being not so noticeable while it's there, but definitely gives an impact when it has disappeared. I tried to mimic the original version as much as possible, just cleaning it up with better production and adding a few subtle instrumental additions, but for the most part it is basically still the same song. Once again, this song doesn't have a ton going for it musically, it's pretty much the same four chords on repeat with a MINISCULE amount of stylistic flare every once in a while. At the time I originally wrote it, it was definitely meant to be a lyric-centric song, hoping that the words would be enough to carry the entire track. Now looking back, it's a little bit hard to listen to. Surprisingly, some of the lyrics have aged well, to an extent. It is hard to put myself in the mind of my angsty, teenage self going through a breakup, and a lot of the lyrics are corny and sappy as hell. To be fair, I have heavily distanced myself from a lot of my old sad songs because it is so hard to listen to yourself whining about something that you're no longer emotional about, does that make sense? It's much easier to listen to OTHER PEOPLE'S sad songs, but forcing me to listen to my own sad songs could be used as a literal torture tactic. The whole time, I'm sitting here listening to myself sing and I'm thinking "oh my god, grow up! Get over it! You're so dramatic, please chill out, it's not that deep!" I don't want people to feel like this is a stupid song and they are stupid for enjoying it, absolutely not! I'm solely writing this based off of my own perceptions of the songs and how I feel listening to them five years after they released. I leaned heavily into sad songs for almost the entirety of my first three albums; I have been told that I write very good sad songs, but personally, I have absolutely no interest in listening to them. They definitely serve a purpose, but I think it is pretty clear that I have consciously made the shift to making louder, more dynamic, fun songs. I think there is a lot of misfortune in the world, but I also think there is a lot of humor in the world, and I like to poke fun at myself. I spent the first half of my life taking everything so personally and so seriously, now I really just want to laugh at myself and have a fun time. I can write songs that have sad undertones or emotional themes, but they don't HAVE to SOUND so desolate and dark. For example, the next song on this album, "Slightly Burnt Coil" is certainly not a happy song, but it's also not a drag to get through because it is upbeat and fun to listen to. Anyway, tangent over. This song was originally written when I was in my sophomore year of high school. In my English class, I was sat next to this absolute loser asshole (my good friend Billy Ailtmar), and we became buddies real quick. I don't know how this conversation came up, or why, maybe Billy will be able to share more about it, but somehow he started telling me about a girl he really liked, and he told me the WHOLE story from start to finish about their friendship and how everything ended up playing out. Me, being the annoying kid that only thought about myself and my music, I said to him "yoooo, dude, that would be such a crazy idea for a song!" So of course, I went home, took his story, and wrote a song about it. A lot of the lyrics were pulled directly from his retelling of events and written almost verbatim. In the original demo of the song, I had Billy write and record an outro monologue, which he did, and when it came time to re-record this track, he politely opted not to, as it had been probably two to four years since the original writing and recording. Like I mentioned, I wanted to keep this recreation as close and faithful to the original as possible, so I thought it was very important to keep Billy's monologue, this time I had just decided to do it myself. I wholeheartedly, without a doubt in my mind, believe the best part of this song is during the spoken-word at the end when it says "you once told me that hope is inevitable, and I am hoping." I still think about that all the time, and all of that is credited to Billy. Long story short, Vivian is a real person, she has heard both versions of this song (she doesn't like them), this is based on a true story, and we are all on good terms. But let me leave some space down below for Billy to give his input.
Interview with Billy Ailtmar:
Billy, Billy, Billiam. Here we are. Who would've thought that we'd be discussing "Vivian" almost ten years after its original release? First and foremost, what are your thoughts on this song all these years later?
Billy:
Do you have any memories from this time in our lives or would you like to add any more context that I may have forgotten to include?
Billy:
If you feel comfortable doing so, would you recount the story that led to the creation of this song?
Billy:
What do you remember from when you originally wrote and recorded your spoken-word portion of the song?
Billy:
It's pretty crazy that this was our first time writing any music with each other, and now we have a band together, and we make music that sounds nothing like this. Feel free to use this time to give our band Fish Zoo a plug.
Billy:
Slightly Burnt Coil:
The moment we all (or at least I) have been waiting for. "Slightly Burnt Coil" took a lot of moving parts and a lot of amazing, creative people to conceive the song that we know and love today. The song was written collaboratively between myself and David Roso. The title came from an inside joke between the two of us while we were hanging out; David took a drag from my vape and exclaimed "your coil is always slightly burnt" (which was true). And for whatever reason, I had the genius idea, "bro, that should definitely be a song title!" Usually when friends are shooting the shit and come up with hypothetical song titles, nothing ever comes of it, but for some reason we really decided to pursue this idea. The conversation continued and David filled me in on a story involving a late night trip to Wawa and a meatball sub (he'll tell you all about it later), and we ultimately chose to make the premise of this imaginary song to be all about the meatball sub incident. I went home that night and started drafting out some lyrics for the song. I can't remember any of these lyrics so I'm not sure how many, if any, made the cut for the official version. I messed around with some chords and tried to get my ideas on paper, honestly nothing too exciting. Some time passed and David had a very troubling experience in his life (once again, not my story to tell, David will definitely explain his perspective during our interview). This experience was really the catalyst and inspiration for actually writing a song with any semblance of substance. The combination of a slightly burnt coil, the meatball sub incident, and this fresh experience all came together to conceive the lyrics that had a lot of fun and a lot of heart. From that point on, David and I worked pretty closely on the song together; it went through a few brief changes but we had finally found our vision and were sticking with it. Originally, the song was just going to be acoustic and it would have been A LITTLE slower than it is now, which is crazy to think about, but in the grand scheme of things, those weren't big adjustments to make. Because there are so many people involved in the creation of this song, I'd like to give everyone their credit now as well as do a deeper dive later. Here are the names of everyone that made "Slightly Burnt Coil" into the song that it is:
David Roso: Inspiration, Written by, Electric Guitar, Vocals
Dylan Tasch: Recorded, Mixed, Mastered, Electric Guitar
Brandon Roseberry: Drums
Gabby Pirmann: Vocals
Corabelle: Vocals
Ian Kozlik: Music Video
Sean Cahalin: Written by, Vocals, Acoustic Guitar, Bass, Keyboard
Buckle your seatbelts and make sure you don't crash your car, this track discussion is going to be LONG.
The song starts off with a sole acoustic guitar softly plucking the intro riff. To be completely honest, I don't entirely remember writing this riff, but I THINK I was learning how to play "Edward 40hands" by Mom Jeans at the time, and while I had my fingers positioned on the frets to play, I started messing around with some surrounding notes, and eventually landed on the intro for "Slightly Burnt Coil". It is by no means a complete ripoff of "Edward 40hands" but every once in awhile I will REALLY hear it in the riff of "SBC". As the intro riff rings out and the plucking turns into palm-muted strums, you can hear the flick of a lighter and the bubbling and exhale from a bong. No, it was not fake, yes I really did take a bong rip right into a microphone and kept it in the song (it honestly fits perfectly). Brandon Roseberry is an absolute master of the drums, he really found the perfect ways to contribute, knowing when to be subtle and just accentuate and also knowing when to go all out and really go hard on the drums. I genuinely could not be happier with how the drums turned out, they're just absolutely iconic. About one minute into the song, the first verse ends and the full band kicks in like crazy, Dylan Tasch rocking an unforgettable electric guitar on lead. Just shy of two minutes into the song, we transition back to acoustic for a slow, single strummed chorus with the pivotal "too bad I crashed my car, no need to wash it anymore" with an underlying keyboard. These lyrics, I think, still hold up so well; I feel that these two lines perfectly encapsulate the themes of the song as well as striking the balance between the depressing aspects of life while simultaneously finding the humor in them. In all reality, the concept of getting into a car crash and your first thought being "well, at least I don't need to go to the car wash anymore" is so bizarre and hilarious to me. The slowest part of the song and the loudest part of the song are back to back and gives whiplash in the exact way that emphasizes the idea of a car crash. The loud hits of the drums and strikes on all the guitars cause an abrupt buildup that leads to gang vocals, performed by David, Gabi, Corabelle, and myself. This is easily, without a doubt my favorite part of the song. I love the lyrics, I love the intensity of the instrumentals and gang vocals, and I love the memories of recording it. I remember when we first recorded the gang vocals, before everything had been mixed and worked on, my first reaction was "IT SOUNDS LIKE KIDZ BOP! THIS IS AWESOME!" I think the gang vocals are perfectly leveled without any one person standing out more than the other, and I think it does effectively sound like a decent sized group of people despite it only actually being four of us. But I think it's so fun that I can accurately pinpoint each specific person singing. I've utilized gang vocals on quite a few of my songs throughout the years, and I am so amazed that we were able to create this atmosphere that fits so seamlessly with the vibe of the song. If the gang vocals were TOO aggressive, it would've sounded off, and if they were any softer it would have lost a lot of its impact. I just love every aspect of the sequence in the song. As the gang vocals end with "I can't comprehend why I'm even worrying anymore" we get a few solo echoing "anymore"s sung by David, followed up by a distant "then I crashed my car" sung by me. I'm trying to be as thorough in my recap as possible, but I mainly bring this specific piece of information to your attention because David was doing his best to match my vocals, and if I didn't know better, I would have assumed that it was all sung by me. I commend David for giving it his all in his first ever vocal performance, he absolutely crushes it. In the latter half of the song, I take some risks on my vocals. At this point in time I was still very hesitant about my voice, I had definitely gotten better at singing, but I was still getting comfortable with it and was very self-conscious of straying from a performance that I knew worked. But I think this is one of the first signs of me (at least halfway) going for it. In hindsight, I probably could have committed harder, but I think it works nonetheless. It also helps a lot that David was accompanying me on vocals for the second verse and pre-chorus. Once again, the song jumps back to the acoustic guitar being most prominent in the mix with some back and forth picking of notes while the drums die down a little bit while still giving an incredible performance and matching the energy. Once the vocals stop during this portion, I change up the picking a little bit and the drums really emphasize each important hit until it all comes back together for one loud, final chorus. I won't lie, I absolutely love this song with my whole heart. This was the first song of mine that actually got some recognition, and ever since its release it has been within my top five songs on Spotify. I have so many fond memories from the creation of this song and it will most likely always be a staple on my set lists when I am performing live. I am so thankful to everyone who has listened to this track and given it love and support because I really think it is still one of my best songs and I don't think I will ever be able to replicate the magic or catch lightning in a bottle in the same way. But, that's not all there is to say about this song. This was the first single from the album, released on September 13th, 2019 (Friday The 13th) with a music video. I also released a small batch of very limited edition 7" vinyl that featured "Slightly Burnt Coil" on Side A and "Puzzles" on Side B (sold out, sorry). The music video for "Slightly Burnt Coil" was written, storyboarded, filmed, and directed by Ian Kozlik during the summer of 2019. It features David and I as the main and only characters and we had some brief behind-the-scenes help from Jack Kyle (shoutout Jack again for always going along with my antics and lending a helping hand). The video opens with some establishing shots of my old house in the beautiful sunlight of summer. It then cuts to me, half dressed, sleeping on a couch in the basement, where you can see a small table that is holding my phone and the titular vape that housed the dreaded slightly burnt coil. I wake up at 4:30pm, get dressed in a dirty, smelly shirt, wreak havoc on my bathroom mirror as I spit out foamy toothpaste, and peak out the window to reveal David's car pulling into the driveway to pick me up. We kept a lot of the music video deliberately vague and up to interpretation, despite having a very fleshed out storyboard. My character is meant to be a down-in-the-dumps loner that doesn't have much drive or motivation in life, and David's character is a fun-loving extrovert that's always up for exploring and adventuring and taking in everything the world has to offer, mostly just very exaggerated versions of ourselves. It's clear that the only time my character has any fun and cracks a smile is when David is there to pull him out of a slump. I get in David's car, we put on "I Hate My Friends Part 2" (off of my self-titled album) and hit the road. We cut to some beautiful shots of us walking down the canal in Lambertville, NJ. and finding a nice platform in the water for us to hang out on. It matches the dichotomy of the sunny day out on the water with me entering the cold, dark basement, dealing with negative emotions and having a mental breakdown on the couch. I mentioned earlier that I would briefly discuss the music video for "I'm Trying To Smoke These Hornets" and how it relates to this music video. The two music videos were filmed over a year apart, but I thought it would be awesome to revisit scenes from older videos and make them canon with each other. The music video for "Hornets" is all about a ghost following me around, and I took this scene from "SBC" where I'm having a meltdown and I added a shot of the ghost in the background where you originally wouldn't have seen him due to the angle of the camera. When I recreated this scene, I had recently dyed my hair blue and then shortly came up with this idea. Well, I didn't have blue hair in this original video, so immediately after dying it blue, I had to dye it back to my natural brown to make sure continuity was as accurate as possible. I wore the same outfit, set the basement with the same props, had about the same hairstyle, and tried to act exactly as I did during this music video. All in all, I'd say it worked out pretty well. Anyway, my meltdown thoroughly displays my inner turmoil, and as I catch a glimpse of my old guitar, it suggests that I have given up on my passions and have lost all interest in things that used to bring my happiness. As the gang vocals are getting ready to jump in, showing in between a black screen there are quick cuts of flashbacks and memories of David and I, driving around, talking shit, and eating meatball subs from Wawa. We have a shot of us sitting atop a bridge as David is playing our song, and I begin to engage with it but it is clear I'm not fully invested. We go on hikes with beautiful sunsets, hang by the water, and fly around with geese, conveying that David is really pushing to get me out of my comfort zone and depression. Eventually, we find ourselves at the abandoned graffiti train in Lambertville, taking in all the art and incredible shots of us exploring and shrouded by the shadows of the train. Opposed to taking spray paint and making a huge display of our friendship, David carves a tiny "SBC" in the old paint and rust. This is metaphorical for how David's grand gestures end up being miniscule in fighting my angst. What I really need comes from all the micro-niceties, spending time with me, being allowed to show vulnerability, someone who understands and accepts me. It also represents that this small moment in time is just a drop in the bucket of all of our experiences, both as a reference to how my sadness will not last forever, and simultaneously showing that David and I have many, many, many more years to live full lives with infinite possibilities and incomprehensible happiness. The small carving can also be an example of how I am unable to see the good when there is so much overwhelming dread that is surrounding and suffocating me. We slow it down and I'm back to my usual spot, rotting on the couch, drinking my life away in my solitude, when David bursts through my door to literally and figuratively drag me out of my rut. David takes me to a peaceful, quiet, secluded place in nature with a campfire burning and he continues to play songs for me. I continue to fight it and not give in to these positive experiences, but David grabs my old guitar, writes "Slightly Burnt Coil" in sharpie, and manages to get a genuine giggle out of me. This makes me realize the permanence of our friendship and gives me the comfort and strength to accompany him while we perform our song, finally complete. And that's the end of the video; I know I gave a pretty heavy breakdown of events in this video, but I certainly hope I did not reveal too much to detract from anyone else's interpretation. I don't think there is a definitive interpretation, I'm sure if you ask me, David, Ian, or anyone else in the world, we would all have different views of it. Some people have told me that it's about a friend who has died, some people have told me that it's about a secret gay relationship, I've heard tons of different perspectives and I love them all. I hope you all continue to watch and listen and come up with your own theories as to what everything in the video is supposed to represent. I love this video so, so much. What's so nice about it is this video really just gave us an excuse to hang out all summer and take a video camera with us. It is a perfect encapsulation of that summer for us, an absolute time capsule of our lives before we moved further apart, before the world got shut down, and before we were thrown into the deep end of adulthood. It is so pure and wholesome in my eyes and every so often I will rewatch it and relive those experiences and reminisce on what an incredible friendship David and I have. I'm so excited to talk with David Roso, Ian Kozlik, Brandon Roseberry, and Corabelle about this song in their own individual interviews.
Interview with Brandon Roseberry:
Hey, Brandon, thank you so much for joining me to talk about "Slightly Burnt Coil"! Hope you've been doing well, and its always nice chatting with you.
When was the last time you thought about or listened to this song? Be totally honest!
Brandon:
You recorded percussion for this track, and did a phenomenal job by the way, do you remember anything from that day? Looking back, are there any things you would change about your performance or are you happy with how it turned out? Please tell me EVERYTHING you remember, did I give you any suggestions or notes, how did you come up with everything, what did you think when you first heard the finished product? Anything at all!
Brandon:
You also did the drums for my song "Caterall" (which is up next on the tracklist), do you remember one song being easier to drum on or were they both about the same level of difficulty? Do you have a personal preference for one song over the other?
Brandon:
Did you have any idea while you were sitting in the recording booth that we would be discussing these songs over 5 years later?
Brandon:
Thank you again so insanely much for taking time out of your day to answers these questions, you're an absolute homie and I appreciate the hell out of you for everything you do!
Interview with Ian Kozlik:
What's up, dude? So good to catch up with you again.
I'll ask you the same starter question I gave Brandon, when was the last time you listened to this song or watched the music video? It is totally okay if your honest answer is "I've never revisited this video."
Ian: Probably a month or so after it was made.
What do you remember from that time in your life, around spring/summer of 2019? Do you remember how we got connected to shoot this video together? What were your thoughts when I reached out about this?
Ian: It was incredibly exciting for me as I was still in school for film and photography. The opportunity excited me tremendously to have the chance to use the skills I learned and apply into a product. I could do sooooo much better now haha
Are you happy with how the video turned out? Did your vision for it come to fruition? Is there anything you would change about it if you had the opportunity to do it differently?
Ian: It did come out pretty well! There are certainly many more techniques that I have learned since that could be applied to the video to make a better product. I can say it certainly was fun though, if I had another go with additional years of experience the end result would be better.
What do you remember from our discussions revolving around the filming of this video? Can you tell us about all of your ideas for it, especially if there were ideas we ended up not following through with? Can you recall any of your original storyboards or anything like that?
Ian: To be honest I don't remember a lot of the initial concepts, however from what I remember a lot of the initial concepts made it into the final product. It was just the diversity of the shots, angles, and lighting that would be approached differently now.
Were David and I easy to work with or were we a total pain in the ass? Did you have fun working with us?
Ian: Making the video just felt like friends hanging out, collaborating, and creating something fun together! We had a blast from what I remember! There wasn’t much frustration if any, but any of that came from my own abilities in those moments in time.
What is your interpretation of the music video?
Ian: I love it! Even though it could be astronomically better if redone, it’s like a mini time capsule to another point in our lives. We were all growing up and are still figuring things out, and I think that’s exactly what it resembles to me.
As far as I'm aware, you are still filming and editing, where can we find you and your other work?
Ian: YES! Still doing video and photography on the side and for my own creative expression! You can find me on Instagram @iankozlik00_ ! I’m an artist at heart and just don't know what I would do without the ability to express myself and create art using various mediums. It’s just a part of me.
Thank you so much for taking some time to answer these questions for me! I sincerely appreciate your input and perspective!
Interview with Corabelle:
Hey, Corabelle. For anyone who doesn't know, you are my little sister, and we have about a 14 year age gap. At the time of recording "Slightly Burnt Coil", you were probably around 5 or 6 years old and now you are 11. Do you remember anything from when I brought you into the music studio to sing in the gang vocals?
Corabelle: I remember putting on headphones and needing to read the lyrics while I sang them. I was excited and there was a circular black microphone in front of me that I sang into and then it was recorded into the song.
Is this your favorite song I've ever released, or do you have a different favorite?
Corabelle: This one is my FIRST favorite, but I have a few others that I like. Right now my favorites are "Blockbuster Video" and "Puzzles" but I do still really like "Not Much Of A Donkey (Eeyore)".
Do you remember when David, Ian, and I were filming the video around our house?
Corabelle: I think so. I remember when you went to the abandoned train with all the graffiti. I remember you were showing all of our animals and pets and I remember you were going somewhere, I think it was the abandoned train, and then you went on a bridge of some kind that was over a river or a lake.
Did you have fun while we were in the studio? What was your favorite part?
Corabelle: Yeah, I had fun. My favorite part was recording and singing the song, and hanging out with all the friends there. I think I did a good job singing.
Who is the best older brother in the world?
Corabelle: Obviously you
Who is the best little sister in the world?
Corabelle: ME!
Interview with David Roso:
DAVID! I had to save you for last because I knew you and I would have the most to talk about. Here we are, over 5 years later, and "Slightly Burnt Coil" is still one of my best songs ever written. Can you believe that? I strongly believe this song would not exist or would not be nearly as awesome as it is if it wasn't for your contributions. What do you remember from the day that we came up with the song title? You absolutely have to tell everyone the meatball sub story, also!
David: I think the title was summed up to completion in that it was just a joke based on a true story, I just remember that it was one of the many evenings where we were just vibing and telling our normal stories around vapes being piss poor quality all the time around then. The meatball sub story is a classic. I was at a friends place and we were getting stoned to the absolute bone on the harshest dabs at the time. I was taking a nap and woke up just incredibly hungry so I went to the wawa that was right near by and grabbed a meatball sub at 3am. I was eating some bites on my way home and it was super hot to bite so i stuck it out the window to cool it off and sub just flew all over my car door from the wind. Super funny even at the time.
In my review, I alluded to the deeper story that led to the legitimate creation of this song, if you're comfortable sharing, that would be awesome, if not, that's completely understandable.
David: Yeah so in late 2018 I got diagnosed with a panic disorder and constantly had an irrational fear of death, so my mind was always blacking out even though I cut out everything that was bad for me to try and preserve my health which at the time I thought was rapidly declining. I had lots of hospital visits which were basically deemed as panic episodes, then just constantly tried to find ways to better my mental and come to the conclusion that I would make it to the next day. I developed a small drinking problem once I was 21 and had easy access to liquor because it helped fight the anxiety. This song strongly focuses on the inner dismantling of my mental health and recreates the sporadic thought processes that I was going through, constantly overthinking everything I did and was doing. We tried everything to make it right but at that time it felt like all efforts were futile. I remember vividly that at the time us hanging out was one of the only experiences I had felt consistent comfort in, and it was a way for me to reset myself a little bit during the explosive thought processes I was enveloped in.
Do you remember when I first suggested the idea of writing a song together? Can you recall the first draft I sent you and what your thoughts were? Share anything you remember about the writing process, and did you think it went smoothly or was it a nightmare for you?
David: As mentioned in the last answer, a lot of things were blacked out for me with stress so timelines are a bit jumbled, but as for the events themselves I remember reviewing the initial guitar riffs sent for the intro period and the basic lyric structure which I had only given little tweaks to here and there. I think the biggest parts I had contributed to were just making some of the moments I experienced a little smoother to transition between in the lyrics.
Jumping from the writing process over to the recording side of things, how did you feel when we first walked into Dylan's house to track this song? What were your first thoughts? How much of the process do you remember?
David: I remember thinking “damn that's a lot of shit” when I saw the whole set up. It was the first time I was ever in any studio before and there were so many gadgets. I remember recording the bong rip, doing vocals where we overlaid stuff and working with Corabelle for the group parts, but also just thinking of ideas in Dylan's space just to add or remove sounds.
How do you think you did as far as recording your first ever song? Were you nervous singing into a mic and recording guitar? How do you feel your parts turned out? Did you think the song would turn out this way when we first started writing it? If not, what were you originally expecting it to sound like?
David: I actually wasn't too nervous at all since there was no audience and we had multiple tries to get things to sound the way we wanted to. Truthfully though I don't think 95% of my guitar parts made the final cut because I didn't have a full vision of how to match SBC’s unique sound style. I'm not mad about that though because having that in the track was way less important to me than the fun we had during the creation process. I thought it was going to be all acoustic as aforementioned but I like the way it turned out.
Do you have any behind-the-scenes stories that I may not have touched on in my review? Whether it be about writing, recording, or shooting the video?
David: Never forget the scene where you are walking out of your house and I'm blasting the big time rush theme as you get into the car. That's always my favorite portion. As for anything with me specifically though I think we covered the most important parts. I cant remember exactly what words we shared but I know we had a lot of introspective conversation in between scenes about the entire concept of SBC as a whole.
Would you change anything about the process or the final product?
David: Not a damn thing, I think it was our best work in collaboration, and got us one of the greatest memories we could share.
I know we've had plenty of private conversations about this song and its video, I think we feel pretty similarly about it, but I would love to do a deep dive into your personal thoughts and experiences. First and foremost, do you like how it all turned out?
David: It turned out exactly right in my opinion. Looking back this many years down the line, things look far better than I remember them being at the time, and the story is captured with a perfectly niche artistic essence that gives viewers and listeners a great insight into the multiple avenues the brain can take under stress, while simultaneously encapsulating the yin and yang of introversion and extroversion. Putting on face is something we all experience at some point and we turned that imaginative concept into reality.
What is your favorite part of the video or song in general? Whether it be a specific part of the official track/video or if it's a memory surrounding it?
David: The line “my brain is melting, my heart is pounding, sweat is dripping, wish I could have done…something” resonates with me consistently because it reminds me how far I've come from an experience that was otherwise catastrophic for me at the time. It might have been rough then, but the perspective change reminds me that you can eventually face your anxiety and work out of that mental fog.
Do you have a differing interpretation of this music video? Please explain what you think it's all about and what everything represents.
David: The video goes back to what I mentioned about yin and yang, and directly enforces the importance I discussed about how you were there for me when I needed it. The roles might be reversed on film but the core concept was an important element to me. A support system can help get a foot in the door when trying to break out of a depressive cycle. What it means most to me specifically is that you are not alone.
When are we writing "Slightly Burnt Coil Part 2"?
David: We can call it fully burnt coil and it can be about the turmoil of adult life and how we are forced into maturity by society. As for when, whenever the juices begin to flow.
Thank you all for joining me to relive this time in our lives, love you guys!
"Slightly Burnt Coil" Music Video
If you are reading this, congratulations! You have found the secret discount code for Strangeness In Proportion's site-wide sale.
Use the code "strange_rabbithole_35" at checkout for 35% off your entire purchase at https://strangenessinproportion.bandcamp.com
This code is eligible for EVERYTHING on the site, music AND merch. This sale ends on May 1st, 2025.
Caterall:
We are almost at the end of this album inter-review. Track five, "Caterall" is honestly, in my eyes, a bit of the black sheep of the album. I don't mean to say that this song is terrible by any stretch of the imagination, but of all the songs on this album, I NEVER revisit this one. "Hornets" has an awesome music video, "Puzzles" has a beautiful duet with a female vocalist, "Vivian" is the quintessential sad song, "Slightly Burnt Coil" is hands down my favorite song on the album, and "Ghost Story" created the entire theme for the album as well as the album title "Secondhand Heartbeat", whereas "Caterall" is just kind of there. But, It's definitely not filler!! There are a lot of positive things to say about this song, but I probably haven't listened to it in at least two or three years. I don't remember much about this song and the writing process for it, but I do remember how I came up with the title. I remember reading somewhere that cats have a crazy attraction to Adderall; so many people who had Adderall in their house would come home from school or work or wherever and their cats would be breaking into their pills. Honestly, I can't remember why cats are so into it, and I've never actually bothered to fact-check this, but I thought the idea of it was so funny that I wanted to have a song title that referenced the phenomenon. I don't really like the lyrics to this song much, I honestly couldn't tell you what my thought process was or what I was trying to say while writing this song. Realistically, if I had to guess, I think I had the song title decided before the song was written, and I just stuck with the theme of getting high on various drugs, which is pretty outdone and not really a clever idea for a song. I think all the lyrics lack any substance or meaning whatsoever; HOWEVER, the vibes of this song do a really good job at connecting the album between the more punk songs like "Slightly Burnt Coil" and transitioning into the album finale with "Ghost Story". Really the only big praise I give this song is due to the instrumentals. Once again, Brandon Roseberry does a great job on drums, and Dylan Tasch spits out some INSANE guitar solos. Those guitar solos alone are enough to make this song worth listening to. The song starts with some super reverbed sounds, if I remember correctly, I explained to Dylan what I was looking for to be the intro, and they pulled out their guitar and blasted it full of insane reverb to get this ghostly, distant swell to lead into the song. My acoustic guitar comes in with some light drumming as the ambience fades out. Shortly thereafter, I begin singing, and oh my god my vocals are so drab, bland, monotone, and boring for the majority of this song. I guess you could make the argument that it fits the vibe of the song because I sound so disinterested and zoned out, but it is not a great creative decision or performance whatsoever. Especially coming off of "Slightly Burnt Coil", listening to my droning vocals is such a drag. I also think my timing and pitch are wildly off a lot of the time. Unlike normal, I think I put more thought into the music side of this song than I did for the lyrics or vocals, which is unfortunate but very evident. At the very least I do occasionally attempt to be ever so slightly dynamic with my voice, specifically after the first guitar solo, it cuts out quickly with almost a whisper of vocals and acoustic guitar until I slowly build it back up into a powerful and raw loudness of "years and years and years" that leads into the second guitar solo. I really don't have much more to say about this track, unfortunately. I don't have many specific memories about it, and listening to it again did not really evoke much out of me. I can't express enough how incredible Dylan's guitar solos are, honestly I think this song would have most likely been cut had it not been for the guitar solos saving it. Brandon does a great job on drums but it is a much more subdued performance than that of "SBC". I think I could have spent a lot more time working out how to make this song more interesting. In my opinion, I think it kind of falls flat because of the lack of time I dedicated to making it the best it could be. I'm not going to sit here and try to pull more out of my ass than I already have, especially because you just read SO MUCH about the making of "Slightly Burnt Coil". Moving on!
Ghost Story:
The finale to this album starts with silence, quickly followed by the lyrics "I am a ghost" as an acoustic guitar starts haphazardly strumming some very dissonant chords (to this day, I have no idea what chords I was playing). Dylan Tasch once again contributed some electric guitar with extreme ambient effects, and Devon Czekaj brought the much-needed synth. The synth is an ever-present wave of sound that extends through the entire track, looming over the mix just like a ghost itself. It feels cold, breezy, and ominous, exactly what I was hoping for when we were recording. In the studio, Dylan had a very old piano that wasn't in the best shape ever, and I knew I had to have a repeated key smash every time I sang "my piano" in the song. It's a simple detail but I think it was a wonderful inclusion to help build the ghostly atmosphere. Before I dive deeper into the song itself, I need to give you some context as to why this song exists. There is an A24 film that came out July 7th, 2017, titled "A Ghost Story". When I first heard about it, I knew I HAD to see it before it left theaters. Majority of theaters weren't playing it to begin with because of how independent it was, but I tracked down a showtime at a far away theater and I loved every second of it. If you haven't seen the movie, you absolutely need to, it is still one of my all-time favorites. Essentially, the movie is about a man who dies and becomes a sheet ghost haunting his widowed wife. A lot more happens than that, but for the sake of keeping it vague, that's a quick summary. There is very little dialogue in the movie, 90% of it is solely visual storytelling, with absolutely gorgeous cinematography. It is not a scary movie whatsoever, it is trying to explore concepts of death, existentialism, memory, lasting impact, and fate (amongst other things). The whole time you are sympathizing with this ghost and all I can say is that it's a beautiful movie and I will be a pretentious, artsy asshole who recommends it constantly until the day I die and become a sheet ghost, and then I'll haunt you all until you watch it. Anyway, that is where I got the idea for this song; a lot of the lyrics are direct references to the movie. I think the song stands on its own, but if you've seen the film, you will definitely get more out of this track. One of my favorite aspects of this song is we took about three to six audio clips from the movie, put them through ridiculous effects to make them into unrecognizable, indiscernible, nonsensical sound, and strategically placed them throughout the song. If you listen REALLY, REALLY closely around 46 seconds, 1:41, 1:54, and 2:25, you might be able to pick out some of the quotes. Look out for a drastic increase in static sounds and that is most likely one of the warped samples we used. I don't listen to this song very often, mostly because (as I mentioned previously) I don't tend to enjoy my slower, sadder songs as much, but I really love all the work that went into this track, the references and Easter eggs that would never be picked up on (unless I wrote about them in a tell-all article like this), and the entire concept of it and its existence. We were very creative making this song as haunting as we could, and I think we thoroughly succeeded. The lyrics "secondhand heartbeat" is not a reference to the movie, it was a purely original phrase of my own creation, but I believe it is very thought-provoking, has a nice, poetic ring to it, and perfectly encompasses the themes of this song (and a lot of the album). To me, the words "secondhand heartbeat" imply the act of keeping someone, or something, alive. Whether it be literal by giving someone a reason to live or saving them from themselves, or metaphorical and more abstract by leaning into the idea that no one ever dies as long as their memory and their impact outlives them. These words could also suggests a physical closeness, being able to feel or hear someone's pulse via proximity to them. I would love to hear how everyone else interprets this phrase and what it means to all of you. I am so excited to have reconnected with Devon Czekaj for an interview about his involvement on this track.
Interview with Devon Czekaj:
Thank you so much for being open to answering some questions! I'll try to make this quick and painless for you.
When was the last time you've listened to "Ghost Story" and what are your thoughts on it? Do you enjoy how it turned out? Now, five years later, are you happy with your synth performance? Would you do anything differently now?
Devon: I haven't listened to Ghost Story in awhile. The last time I did I remember being impressed with how many people you got to contribute to the album. Looking back I think it's hilarious how you picked the simplest synth take I did. I wish I played a few more notes instead of droning on one tone.
Do you remember when I first approached you asking if you'd be able to contribute synth to a song? What were your first thoughts? Did I give you any type of explanation as to what I was looking for or what the song was about? Do you remember if I gave you any notes in the studio or did I just let you do your thing and stayed hands off?
Devon: I was surprised at first that you asked me because my own music is so different and I was worried I was the wrong person for the role, but figured I could be the equivalent of Brian Eno in Roxy Music. I just tried to do my best in the context of your song.
Do you have any specific memories or stories from recording together? How was your time in the studio? Did you have a good time working with me?
Devon: I remember doing about 3 different takes that were all probably too prog and complex for what you wanted. In the end you picked my simplest take. The studio was fun, you were just so passionate about the album and it was easy to feed off your energy.
Regarding the entire album, it's a bit funny, I kind of feel like Batman in a way; my whole life I have been terrified of ghosts, and like the old phrase "if you can't beat them, join them" I gave in and (metaphorically) became a ghost. I turned into what I feared the most, learned to understand and sympathize with them, and wrote an entire album about it. I spent a lot of time being immensely critical on this album, and yeah, maybe the execution wasn't always spot on perfect, but as a whole, I really do love this album. I love the songs (even my least favorites), I love the themes, I love the entire concept, I love what it stands for, I love all my little ghost friends, I love the memories, I love the experiences and opportunities it has allowed me to have, I just love it all. One of my favorite stories from the creation of this album is how I made the album art. At the time, my grandparents' basement was entirely used for storage and was absolutely full of junk that had been accumulated over the last 40+ years. I went down there and had a friend snap some pictures of me looming in dark corners and then I would pick two of my favorites, paint over myself with Wite-Out, draw some dotted eyes with a black sharpie, and make myself into a ghost. When we went to print the pictures, my printer was low on some colors of ink, so it didn't print properly, and instead, it printed with this purple hue over the entire thing. I think that was one of the happiest accidents or miracles in disguise that I have ever experienced. It was COMPLETELY unintentional, but it worked so beautifully, I couldn't have made it any better if I tried, and I would never be able to recreate it. Ending thoughts: I am so happy with this album, despite its imperfections, I am so glad that it holds up as well as it does, and hopefully I'll be able to revisit it in another five, ten, twenty, fifty years and still look upon it fondly. I appreciate everyone who has listened, followed, subscribed, shared, or engaged at all with any of my music at any point in time, and if you've read this far, thank you so much from the bottom of my heart. But don't click away just yet, there are still a few very important people that I need to interview. Please welcome Colin Marit and Dylan Tasch to the inter-review!
Interview with Colin Marit:
My man, how is everything going? I laid out some context at the beginning of this article to explain who you are, but as a quick refresher, you signed me to your independent record label, "Fixed Frequency" sometime around 2018 I believe. You helped me release this album and did a lot of marketing to promote it, which I am eternally grateful for. I appreciate you taking some time to answer these questions, so let's jump right into it.
How did you discover me and my music? What made you want to sign me to your label?
Colin:
Do you remember any conversations we had surrounding this album? When/how did I first present this idea to you? What were your first thoughts?
Colin:
When was the last time you listened to this album/any of the songs on this album? What are your thoughts on it five years later? Do you have a favorite or least favorite song from this album?
Colin:
If you could advise me to do anything differently when writing or recording this album, what would you suggest (if anything)?
Colin:
You've obviously seen me grow up through quite pivotal years of my life and music career, how do you feel about my natural progression? Do you think I've stayed true to my original sound, or do you think I've changed my style in a positive/negative way?
Colin:
Unfortunately, Fixed Frequency is no longer around, despite many good years having you as my "boss", and I know that if you could, you would still be releasing my music, would you like to share any insight about Fixed Frequency? Are there any bands from the label that you would like to shout out or promote?
Colin:
Out of all my albums (even the ones I don't talk about), "Dinosaurs In Dollar Stores", "Thaw The Earth", Self-Titled, "Secondhand Heartbeat", and my newest album "Anything More Than Fractional", which one do you think is my best work, and why?
Colin:
If you were still in charge of releasing my music, what would you tell me to do next?
Colin:
Thank you thank you thank you thank you thank you for everything you've done to help me and my music. I am forever indebted to you, and I hope we will continue working together far down the line.
Interview with Dylan Tasch:
The man, the myth, the Dyl-legend. It is so awesome of you to take the time to reflect on this album that we worked on so closely together. Your work holds up so well and I am so grateful to have found you to help make this release as great as it could ever be.
Do you remember how we got connected? What was your first impression of me?
Dylan: I actually can't remember how we connected exactly, but for a couple creative types in central bucks county, it doesn't take much for us to find each other! We gravitate towards the same general things so it was a matter of time surely. Especially back then, when there was a cultural lull in Doylestown for creative young people, around the mid 2010s. Which led to my first impression of you being "cool, a young local musician still creating in Bucks County who hasn't moved to Philly. Love to see it”
What can you recall from this time period, from when I first contacted you to schedule studio time, all the way to mastering the album? Does anything specific stand out to you? Do you have any fun stories to share about the process?
Dylan: I recall listening to your previous work pretty thoroughly, before we began working together. It was very interesting and cool to watch/hear you grow as a songwriter and artist in real time, which you continue to do. So many of my questions were answered during our process together, and to watch you be continuously influenced by new music was also cool because you'd bring elements of that music into the songs you were writing
Your fingerprints are ALL OVER this album, you recorded, mixed, and mastered EVERYTHING all by yourself and you contributed guitar on "Slightly Burnt Coil", "Caterall", and "Ghost Story". Were there any songs that you absolutely couldn't stand working on? Were there any songs that were more of a pain than others? Is there one song that you’re more particularly proud of over the rest? What do you think was your greatest contribution to the album?
Dylan: the only thing I directly did not enjoy was the melodica in Hornets, because I have never enjoyed melodica hahahaha......I remember having fun working on Caterall, I think it was the most dynamic and catchy song on the record for me. I also channeled my inner classic rock dickhead for the lead guitar at the end, which is always fun.
Did you have a favorite/least favorite song at the time? Have your opinions changed in the last five years?
Dylan: "Vivian" is probably my least listened to song, only because I tend to gravitate away from slow sad stuff in my personal time. I wouldn't say I have a least favorite, I think all the songs have a place and come from the heart. "Caterall" remains my favorite.
I know when I first started working with you, I had a few albums under my belt, but I was still very young and inexperienced and not well trained in good studio etiquette, how was I to work with? Do you recall any times where I really pissed you off or really surprised you in a positive way?
Dylan: we've certainly had some sessions that were less productive than others, which is just how shit goes when you're working with someone for awhile - but you've pleasantly surprised me with every release we've worked on together. It hasn't always been the smoothest process but other times it was very smooth, and with Secondhand Heartbeat I think the raw emotion that shines through is a testament to your creative process
If you could redo this album today, is there anything you would do differently? Why and how?
Dylan: Well, having mountains of new gear at Landmine, I think it would come out a good bit differently now! I've grown immensely as an engineer in the last ten years, but primarily in the last five. I have way more tools now to really sonically craft what I think it could sound like. Back 5-6 years ago, especially working out of my dad's house, I was really using anything I had to get by while making records, very different from the choices I have today. It would be fun to redo these songs from scratch one day. Ten year anniversary?
You've worked on an infinite amount of incredible singles, EPs, albums, and so much more from so many amazing bands, is there anyone you would like to shout out? Where can people find you to book studio time?
Dylan: Listen to Shock Of Being, Mosin Nagant, Brown Hownd, and then go listen to Shock Of Being again. Find me on IG @_goose._ and message to book, or just to chat. Shout out to Len Carmichael and Zach Miller at Landmine Studios, book with them too! Get your guitars/guitar setups from Dtown Guitars in Doylestown. Buy records from the wax hut in Ewing. Support your local weed dealer, the dispensary don't care about you. Shout out Lenin. Shout out United Musicians and Allied Workers Union. Trans rights are human rights. Shout out freaks of the world. Free Palestine.
Thank you, Dylan, for making this album such a high level of quality that I could never have imagined. Thank you for your insightful answers to my questions. Thank you for everything you do, have done, and will do in the future!
I appreciate you all for reading this far, humoring me and allowing my narcissism to shine through for over twenty-five pages worth of text. This was really a wonderful way to honor and celebrate the legacy of my album and I am so grateful to everyone that had any involvement in its creation, I am so grateful for all the amazing people that were willing participate in interviews, I am so grateful for everyone who has ever listened to any of my songs (even if it was just one time and you turned it off a quarter of the way through because you hated it), and I am so grateful for all of you who are reading this right now. Months ago was when I realized that we were slowly approaching on the 5 year anniversary, and I knew instantly that I wanted to do a deep dive inter-review/retrospective on CD-ROM Rabbit Hole. Taking the time to really listen and really think about all these songs and this album allowed me to have a much deeper appreciation, and I am so proud of myself for how far I've come (okay, get over yourself...), and I am so happy that I still have such fond feelings towards this album. There was a good portion of me that was terrified of starting this review and just cringing and discovering that I hate these songs; luckily, that was not the case. In just a moment, I will stop patting myself on the back and torturing you with my own self-promo (hopefully you won't have to deal with any more of this nonsense for at least another five years), but this was the first step to celebrating the anniversary. The second step is playing a show at Round Guys Brewing Co. in Lansdale, PA. on March 29th. If you are local and want to attend a show featuring myself (Strangeness In Proportion), Judah Featherman, I Didn't Water My Orchids Last Week, and Dumb Angel, check out the flyer with all the information you need, attached below.
Thank you for reading and listening. Have a great weekend, everybody.
Related Posts
